| Yea so ya know, I havn't updated in ages, mostly b/c i've been uber busy with my ever-so-uneventful life...and i also only seem to update when i am in a faul mood. so anyway, school ya...it's abesolutely Faaaan-Tas-tic...I sense sarcasm. eh it's not bad, but it's school so whats to be expected. Last night i watched the saddest thing...ABC primetime had a special on Teenage Bitchy Girls and it was soo sad, a Kid actually committted suicide b/c of it, yea he was disabled and the girls teased him to death, literally... so sad. I suppose everyone can relate to a little torture in highschool, whether they were the torturer or torturee, I'm not sure whats worse. Watching it happen and knowing it is wrong is just as bad. I think all high school students should be forced to watch it. it really made me think.
Last night i was driving home from work, super tired and fell asleep for about 1 second, scared me and tried to wake myself up, good thing i was close to home... yikes.
One thing to look forword to today is No work, Shopping, and most of all I LOVE NEW YORK PIZZA, Yea i'm obsessed...
Next week is National Birthday week, I know 7 People with birthdays next week...it's outta control | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment   |
| | when giving someone such as my sister or cousin directions, i feel that it's easiest to use terms that everyone is accustomed to....such as getting from troy to albany, 787 south, exit to I90 and you want BUFFALO Chicken wings, NOT BOSTON Cream pie...yea i know i'm a Genius. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| Today will go down in History as one of the lowest days of my life...I'm not really sure, it's one of those days where you just feel like "what am i living for? what do i have to look forward too? what the hell am i doing with my life? what is my happiness? where have the passed few years gone? why the hell do i let myself waste time as much as i do? what did it feel like when i was TRUELY, UNCONDITIONALY happy? why do i feel like everyone is against me? why do i feel so UNLOVED right now? why can't i make everyone happy? why do i FALL so hard? why am i such a strong person when it comes to some things, and a DOWNRIGHT WEAK-ASS piece of crap when it comes to others? why am i in school? how did i let myself get as heavy as i am? why am i so BITTER? why do i continue to get myself into stupid situtations, that i know will end sour? why do i let myself get stressed? AND WHY DO I LET PEOPLE TREAT ME LIKE CRAP, KNOW THAT I'M BEING TREATED LIKE CRAP, AND THINK THAT I SOMEHOW DESERVE IT BECAUSE I JUST MUST BE A TERRIBLE TERRIBLE WORTHLESS PEICE OF CRAP?
I remember when I was free, I just want myself back | | comments: Leave a comment |
| Well, first of all i'd just like to say i feel kinda silly writting, since i havn't updated in 20 yrs. but anyhow I was having quite a bad day today, yesterday, and the day before, and felt the need to write.
It all started Saturday when I came home from Amandas 21st party, I was way tired from the good time I had the night before. I had plans later that day to go to my lil Nephews 3rd birthday, not the most exciting but I love spending time with him and the rest of my fam. so I got home my mom took my car to run errunds ( she doesn't have a car so she takes mine, I don't mind ) so I slept and slept, meanwhile the phone was ringing like crazy, but i never answer b/c it's never for me. my dad woke me up and needed my AAA card...and i was like hum...zzzzzz. then it was time to go to the party, i looked out my driveway and my car was missing...yea missing. so i tried not to panic but i was in complete shock, it just so happens that my clutch went...my mom felt awful she cried, and i told her it deff wasn't her fault bc it def wasn't, and i love her. my dad being the insensitive person he is started yelling at me to get over it and to not cry over spilled milk. i just wanted to be left alone, so we all piled in my dads truck, me my mom my aunt carol and my dad. they dropped me off at starbucks, where my sister works, and she new i was sad brought me out a vanilla frapp and we were set to go. my nephews always puts a smile on my face and made me feel better. went back to my sisters appartment, my cuz and i went over to the neighbors and watched Drop Dead Georgous ( hallarious movie By the way ) and i went to bed ALONE :( .
Sunday woke up...ALONE cuzzy and i went to church, we basically slept through it. came home watched the first 15 min of My Best Friends Wedding, then took a beautiful walk, it was a real nice day in Albany. came home took a nap went over to the neighbors again for a B-B-Q and beer. Beer and B-B-Q just go...got pretty tipsy, then passed out on their couch.
Woke up today to Romeo ( my cuzzys evil jerkface cat) clawing my feet. called my work explained my sit, they kinda gave me a hard time and i was pissed, i never call into work....ever!!!! the last time i called into work was at Carters when my Grandfather died...so i think thats a pretty good exuse. my cuz drove me to school at 8am, didn't have class till 10, but whatcha gonna do when you've lost you're ride, not to mention you're independence, i don't think i've ever felt less in control of my life since i didn't have a car. anyway i was just sitting in the Library doing some work, when one of my crushes came up to me and we started up a convo, next thing i know hes inviting me out to breakfast...:) i couldn't resist, i hadn't eaten anything yet, and i had forgotten my wallet this morning. hes pretty cute, in a weird way, i seem to like guys who are different, hes quite charasmatic, and i think thats whats got me. hes a blonde with blue eyes, not my type at all. i love dark hair and dark eyes, but hey maybe i don't even know what my type is anymore....whatever. anyway, he brought me back to school, went to my classes, saw him in the hallway as he called out hey beautiful...as i thought to my self, i look like shit i havn't showered and i'm wearing the same clothes i've worn 3 days in a row....nice right, the one day a guy actually asks me out i look and feel like shiiiit. but fate has a way of doing that to a person. eh who knows. Liam ( my cuzzys ex bf, haha yea thats always a fun one to explain, but we are completely and never will be anything more than just good friends) gave me a ride back to my sister/cuzzys appt, where i will be staying for the next week or so until my car is fixed. yea, it's my second home....haha! i came home tired to sleep, but instead cleaned my sister/cuzzys shower, yea it's a weird obsession i have...i like cleaning showers, it's just when i take a shower i wanna feel completely clean, and taking a shower in a dirty shower doesn't really work out, plus i needed to work out my frustrations. and here i am, just sitting here listening to a lil dave and just thinking about stuff...
i miss my baby more than anything, my car was my happiness, my freedom, my best form of therapy... i'm going crazy, i said i was going to shoot myslef literally 20 times today. haha, i'm just really stressed and it's not getting any better...just one thing after another...but i have to think positive, my car will be fixed, things will get better, and they could be much worse.... | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | so this is love- cinderella | | Time: | 12:05 pm | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/opiummmm/foxies/happy.gif) excited |
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| | Going to Disney tomorrow!!!! | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| | Subject: | pb&j | | Time: | 11:24 am | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/opiummmm/foxies/sad.gif) hungry |
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| this weekend, friday i went home and did nothing.
saturday i woke up went tanning, picked up a want ad diegest to see if there was any puppies for sale, and also to see how my a car like mine is being sold for. i'm planning to sell it in the summer, but i'm still kinda confused. i got home and curtis called, and he wanted to hang out, i told my mom and for some reason she always thinks hes black? i have no idea. so we went to the mall walked around for a little while, saw karisa at hollister, ran into bridget and ryan. then we went and saw Hitch, it was a really cute movie! i love Will Smith! after that we just went back home. we had a good ride home, i love talking to curtis, i'm always soo dumb when i talk to him, but it's fun and he loves it. ( he said that yesterday)
sunday i went to church, drove my mom to work, did tons of laundry cuz it was my national laundry day! went to my grandmas for lunch, came home and karisa called. i went to her house then we went to kearas house ( shes karisas friend from cairo, really cool, makes me laugh a lot) then we went to mcdonalds,i was in such a junk food mood!!! it was sooo good. went back to karisas, jsut hung out for a lil while, then went home.
monday i got detention. so after a long day at school i had to stay after even longer! just because i came in late 3 days last week b/c of the snow storm. so that kinda sucked, but i just went to math help with curtis, adam, and pj. then i went home, went for a nice walk then watched the remains of oprah, it wasn't a good episode yesterday. i ate dinner then watched pochahontas, b/c i had a dream about it the other night and i just really wanted to watch it. i never relized how violent it was...weird. then kimby called, and i was happy to talk to her! i miss her! but we're gonna go shopping on saturday, after i go to the stupid st patricks day parade! i'm not excited about it, but oh well!
today has been dull, i hate my outfit today ( black cords with a white turtle neck, i feel like i should be going to a band concert!) we had to march outside today! it was soo cold and it sucked. i'm really hungry right now, can't wait for my pb& j at lunch. later today i have to go to work then i'm going tanning, then picking my dad up from work.
tomorrow is a half day!! yay! i love half days! | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | mr. jones | | Subject: | just chillin' | | Time: | 04:18 pm | | Current Mood: | optimistic |
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| yea so right now i'm at work, just chillin, waiting for my bosses to come back from a meeting at the school. they won't be back till 5:00 or so, it's only 4:00 now and i've already been here for an hour, and yea i'm bored, lol i have nothing to do!! so i figured this would be the perfect time to update my journal,
today, was the same as anyday really, the Good points: i got on the scale today and it said 130 and i was like wow i lost 4 lbs in like 4 days wow! ( later on i stepped on the scale and it def said 134, weird, musta been cuz i ate breakfast or somthing?)i called kimberly at 7:45 right before i left for school to wish her a happy birthday, she didn't answer, some nerve, hehe, so i left a very nice message on her answering machine for when she feels like answering the phone! hehe!, i did really well on my band test and my band instructor saidd that i have improved a lot which made me feel good, laura robertson commented me on my outfit and told me that i should have gotten best dressed, i don't neccissarily agree but i enjoy the compliment, ( Laura Barker, i love your outfits, i'm not saying anything bad about you), and thats about it....Bad Points: i had to go to school today, for a full day, ugh, once you have a few snowdays and delays in a row you get a lil spoiled, got tons of homework to do including Participation in Government article review on censorship, Math take home test and a worksheet, English write an introduction for my paper, stinky, i've gotten so used to no doing hw that when i have to do just 3 simple assignments i get upset, hehe. and now i'm at work alone doing nothing....
in conclusion, the good def weight out the bad....:)
| | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | free falling -? | | Subject: | delays!!! | | Time: | 11:26 am | | Current Mood: | content |
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| so i've been really lazy lately, yesterday we got let out early from school so from 11:30-4:00 i slept and watched tv... and thats about it. my mom made an awesome dinner, lasanga with spinach instead of meat! sooooo good! laura called and we had a good convo. last night i was thinkin that i really miss karisa and i need to call her soon!
this morning there was a 1 hour delay, so i got up at my normal time but just sat and watched good morning america, i almost cried when i heard the story about the super model that survived the tsunami, but her husband didn't. it was really sad! so now i'm in school, and i can't wait till the weekend!!! | | comments: Leave a comment |
| Friday:
i woke up, made some spinich bread, and headed to st rose to visit my cousin for the weekend. i was really proud of myself because i drove all by myself not knowing where i was going, and i didn't get lost! so i got there around 3:15, i was saposed to be meeting her in front of Brubocher hall at around 4, so i was just sitting in my car for the next 45 min. i met up with her and we hung out at her dorm for a lil while then headed to the dinning hall. we sat and caught up on all the news, then headed to the mall. we went and saw the wedding date. it was a really cute movie, pridictable but cute! we window shopped for a while, then headed back to her drom prob gonna call it a night. we got back and she was checking her messages and meghan had called and told us that nick was having his party tonight not tomorrow. we were kinda bummed b/c we had planned on dressing really nice, but we didn't have the time. so we went to valatie to the party. it was a really good time, it was really nice to see all those people that i hadn't seen in like forever. as soon as i walked in the door i was suprised to see tim, he saw me and belted out "OH MY GOD", yea i felt awkward at that moment, i didn't know if it was a good omg or a bad omg. i played a lil beer pong, which i have no coordination at. kim and i hung out with megan a lil and caught up on what she has been up to since college. after a while the party started dying down, so i started talking to tim. we had a really good long convo, it really made me feel good that we can still be friends.
Saturday:
kimberly woke me up at like 9 ish, she was ready to go home. we also decided it would be a good idea to wake will up. he didn't agree. so we went back to st rose and dropped will off at u albany. we went to breakfast then came back to the room and met up with megan at the mall. we came back to the dorm and watched the notebook, megan hated it b/c she wanted to be in love, i don't blame her. then we had this genius idea to go to a frat party, it didn't really work out that way, it just ended up as me kim megan will and matt in the car in albany for about 2 hours, and on top of that megan and will were fighting the entire time about the most rediculous things. at times it was entertainging, but at other times i wanted to shoot myself. so then we just decided to go to wills dorm and hang out for a lil while. kim megan and i decieded to go through some of his draws and found a hussler magizine, we were ashamed of willie, we thought he had more class. then we called it a night and went home.
sunday:
went to church, got my stuff together, and left. went home and slept for about 3 hours, ate dinner and watched the oscars.
this weekend i stuck to my new years resoulution, and i am proud of myself, i'm not going to be scared to take risks anymore! | | comments: 4 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Subject: | nothing | | Time: | 11:35 am | | Current Mood: | gloomy |
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| so it has been a while since i have written a real entry, so i think that it is about time.
last saturday i went to the formal, it took 3 hours to do my hair, but it was worth it. the formal was kinda on the dull side, there didn't seem to be many people, and i missed some graduates, it just wasn't the same without courtney jones breaking out her awesome dance moves on the floor! ( and court i'm not just saying that b/c you read my journal) but it was alright. it was time well spent.
monday was valentines day, oh valentines day. i try to pretend like it doesn't bother me that i didn't have a valentine on valentines day, but i'm only fooling myself. i didn't realize the romantic side some of my guy friends are, flowers,candy,jewlery,the whole thing was just soo surpizing. so it kinda sucked, it just sat on my couch and watched the notebook for about the 4th time, and wondered and wished if i would ever find a guy like noah, or even fall in love. but i'm just leaving it up to fate for now...who knows...
wednesday
i went over to amandas house and we watched the notebook for the 5 th time, it never gets old
was also the girls sectional game, they're awesome. they won 39-31, i think. it was a good game.
thursday was school then work, thats about it.
today, well, i'm bitter. just not having a good day, i'm out of it, i just kinda wanna go home and go to sleep. but i'm hanging out with amanda after school and going ice skating. i'm looking forward to it. but seriously i don't even know what i'm bitter about, maybe it's lonliness, jealousy, money, or depression. until next time... | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| 1 more day till the NOTEBOOK comes to dvd
1 more day till senior basketball game
5 more days till the formal
13 more days till winter break
41 more days till spring
42 more days till my sister,her husband, and my neice come to town
46 more days till my grandmas suprise 80th birthday party
63 more days till spring break + DISNEY
171 more days till graduation
205 more days till my 18th birthday
( all an estimation ) | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | you belong to me- dunkin shiek | | Time: | 11:43 am | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/opiummmm/foxies/scared.gif) anxious |
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| | well, i haven't updated anything about my life lately, mostly cuz it's boring. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | ryan cabrarra- true | | Time: | 11:24 am | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/opiummmm/foxies/nerdy.gif) dorky |
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| :x: Name = CATHERINE ALICE MCBRIDE
:x: Tattoos = i don't know if i really want one, they just seem so perminant
:x: Piercings = just one whole
:x: Height= 5' 2" on most days
:x: Shoe size = 6-7 1/2, depending on the kind of shoe
:x: Hair color = brown
:x: Eye color = hazlr
:x: Siblings = sisters: Tara 23 Erin 26 Brother: Patrick 31
Last:
:x: Movie you rented = Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (what a dissapointment)
:x: Movie you last bought = i don't even remember, but i will be purchasing the notebook on feb 8th !!!!!!!!!!!
:x: CD you bought/burned = Britany Spears ( the first one )
:x: Song you listened to = don't remember
:x: T.V. show you've watched = 7th Heaven
:x: thing you bought = Air Fresheners for me car
Do:
:x: You wish you could live somewhere else? yea, i'd eventually like to live out west!
:x: Others find you attractive = besides myself...ofcourse!
:x: You want more piercings = maybe just another whole one my ear
:x: You like cleaning = at times
:x: You like roller coasters = yea
:x: You write cursive or print = always print, i forgot how to write cursive, sept my name.
:x: Long distance relationships work = i've never been in one, but i would think not.
:x: Teenage smoking = Smoking is absolutely disgusting.
:x: Driving drunk = sooo dumb
:x: Ever cried over a girl = b/c of a girl
:x: Ever cried over a boy = Yes, who hasn't?
:x: Ever lied to someone. = yea
:x: Ever been arrested = No, thank God!
What:
:x: Shampoo do you use = Garnier Fructis
:x: Shoes do you wear = mostly heels of some sort
:x: Are you scared of = the dark, and the quiet
Number:
:x: Of hearts I have broken? i don't think i can answer that question accurately.
:x: Of people I could trust with my life= only a select few...
:x: Of scars on my body = a few on my legs from shaving accidents and what not.
:x: Of things in my past that I regret? i can't count! but without regret i would never learn anything...!
Do you think you are:
:x: Funny = yea
:x: Loveable = yea
:x: Caring = yea
:x: Dorky = deff
Favorite:
:x: 4 letter word: love!
:x: Actor/Actress: Kelly Ripa
:x: Color(s): red/orange
Person who last:
:x: Slept in your bed: myself
:x: Yelled at you: prob my mom or dad
:x: Sent you an email: Kimberly Anne McHale
Have you ever:
:x: Said "I love you"= Yes
:x: Kept a secret from everyone. = Yes
:x: Cried during a movie= Yea, but not many!
:x: Planned your week based on the TV Guide: yes, and i am ashamed!
:x: Wished you were the opposite sex? i think that it would be a lot easier in some respects!
:x: What time is it now?: 11:38
:x: Apples or bananas? bannanas
:x: Walmart or target?: Target
:x: Spring or Fall?: Spring
:x: What are you gonna do after you finish this?: go to journalism
:x: last noise you heard?: the bell
:x: Smell you sniffed?: My perfume, Basic Instinct, Victoria Secret
:x: Time you went out of state?: in nov. i went to Colorado
:x: Do you believe in love at first sight?: yea
:x: Do you want children one day & if so, how many?:i think 3 is a good #
:x: Most important thing to you in a friendship is? Honesty
Other Info:
:x: Criminal record?: i got caught at a party with alcohol once, not good!
:x: Do you speak any other languages?: Japanese, sort of.
:x: Last book you read: The Notebook
:x: Who you love: well my fam, and some friends, no boys if thats what this question is asking.
:x: How old do you look? 12
:x: How old do you act?: 18, lol idk
:x: What makes you happy?: buying things, making money, driving, singing, eating chocolate, amoung many toher things.
Have You Ever:
:x: Thought you were going to die: Yes
:x: Wanted to Run away: Yes
:x: Flunked a grade: no
:x: Ran away: No
:x: Skipped a grade: No
:x: Gotten drunk: yea
:x: Been in jail: No
:x: Contacted the police: no
:x: Smoked: just cig once
:x: Drank: yea
:x: Been suspended: No
:x: Stolen Anything: haha sunglasses from target, i know i'm a rebel
:x: Cheated On A Test: yea
:x: Been In The Hospital: not cuz i was sick, someone else.
:x: Let a friend cry on your shoulder: yea
:x: Fell asleep in the bath: No
:x: Gone to Church: Yes
:x: Never slept during the night: Yes
:x: Been to camp: No, i'm a deprived child
:x: Didn't wash your hair: i usually wash my hair everyother day
:x: Been in a earthquake: not really, there was a really small one in ny once, but i didn't even know about it.
:x: Been in a tornado: No
:x: Streaked in the streets: No
:x: Screamed at someone: yea
:x: Been attacked: no
:x: Stayed on the phone for over 3 hours: Yes
:x: what time is it now?: 11:46 am | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | Rock-a-bye -sean mullens | | Time: | 11:27 am | | Current Mood: | dorky |
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| my guilty pleasures:
* watching 7th Heaven, One Tree hill, amoung other dumb( not counting Smallville and everwood) WB shows.
* Watching soaps such as Guiding Light and Passions.
* Loving super gaudy (sp) clothing/accesories.
* Looking at my car.
* Looking at other peoples cars.
* Pizza dough ( uncooked )
* Buying shoes.
* Buying Perfumes.
* The smell of Gas.
* Taking magazine Quizzes.
* Reading Horescopes, and actually relating them to my life.
* Eating chicken tenders everytime i go out to eat.( i'm trying to expand my tastes in food)
* Spending hours picking out perfect outfits.
* Obsessing over everyone leaving the milk out too long and it gettting sour.
* Flirting.
* Wearing PJs/sweats as much as possible.
* Taking control and being bossy.
* Counting my money over and over. (when i have it)
* Being cheap with my money.
* Running errunds. | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | someone special- ryan cabrara | | Time: | 07:54 pm | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/opiummmm/foxies/angry.gif) frustrated |
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| | when it rains, it pours... | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | teenage drama queen- lindsay lohan | | Subject: | can't sleep.... | | Time: | 08:44 am | | Current Mood: | sleepy |
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| | so it's 8:44, and i'm feeling not so well. i'm at my cousins house, i can't sleep. i've decided that i just like being home sometimes, for sleep anyway. so yesterday we went and got a french manicure, very nice! then we picked up Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen. not soo god not soo good. then therese and i watched blind date, lol i love that show, just bc the people are sooo stupid. so now i'm just looking up random things to pass time.... | | comments: Leave a comment |
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